It's officially a prediction arms race at this phase of the NFL season. Every prediction is bold; to have a regular, un-bold prediction in this economy? Don't make me laugh. We have now entered a new phase of the prediction world, the thermonuclear prediction, bold prediction 2.0: the aggressively bold prediction.

These predictions are unlikely to occur, but that is what makes them aggressively bold. It may not be that I think these things will happen so much as I think they could happen in the aggressively brave new world we are aggressively living in. Post-trade deadline, aggression is all we have left on the prediction streets; no more fence sitting, call it like you see it.

The Chargers will become the first team in NFL history to finish a season 0-17

Starting out hot with a take I hard launched Sunday night after the worst performance I had seen on a football field in years. To say I was disturbed would be accurate, but saying that you feel hot when you have been lit on fire is also accurate — and yet NOT QUITE SEVERE ENOUGH.

I'm out on the Chargers; I'm so out I'm in a different state having fled local authorities, and now I'm at the airport with my passport fleeing the country under an assumed name trying to get even more out. That game against Houston was so ridiculously bad that any take that suggests the Chargers have a chance to win a football game the rest of the year is just meaningless speculation; nothing we've seen on the field to date points in that direction.

Let's unpack what 0-17 would mean. First, if Justin Herbert plays the whole season and goes 0-17 ... well, that might just be it for his legacy. I can't imagine they won't bench him eventually, but if they actually just let this ride and still don't win? Truly, I'm not sure if it gets worse than that. Second, we need someone to quickly go 0-17 while the season is still 17 weeks long, because we've had two 0-16 teams but no 0-17, and the NFL will eventually add the 18th game — Chargers, get it done.

The Ravens will win the AFC North

The Ravens came into the season the clear favorite in the division, but they are now squarely in last at 4-5 behind the 5-4 Browns and the 6-2 Steelers and Bengals. This take wouldn't be so aggressively bold if not for two simple facts: First, the Ravens do not have Lamar Jackson and will not have him for the foreseeable future, though he is aiming to return at some point this year; and second, while they have two games left against the Steelers and one against the Bengals, Cincinnati's remaining schedule beyond Baltimore is barbecue chicken strips. They get the Browns twice, plus the Commanders, Saints, Panthers and Colts. That'll make it hard to make up ground.

Still, I think it's possible, especially since I stand by the Ravens roster as one of the better teams in the league that has just had the worst QB injury luck. Their defense is stacked with top-end starters, and if Jacoby Brissett can be just good, there could be a long-shot (I'm talking 30-1; this is aggressively bold) backdoor division winner if everything breaks right.

Jordan Love will win the MVP award

Okay, some cross-sport MVP discourse real quick: debating NBA and MLB MVPs rocks. There are so many angles, lots of different ways to think about the award, different value systems to consider, it's just a great time. In the NFL? It sucks.

There are three camps, and they're all bad. In camp one are the people who think the MVP should just be the quarterback on the team with the best record, which is objectively stupid because it's not a team award. In Camp two are those who complain that the "Most Valuable Player" is just the most valuable person in the league, and we all know who that is intuitively (it was Patrick Mahomes for the last six years, now it's Josh Allen), which is also dumb because it's a one-season award rather than a philosophical award. And in camp three are the people who relentlessly complain about how a non-quarterback should win the award and waaaaaaaah it should be Saquon or waaaaaaaaah it should be Cooper Kupp, and this camp makes the other two camps look like royal genius societies because in the modern game of football it's essentially impossible for a non-QB to be more important than a QB.

Here's how we actually do it: The quarterback on a good team — doesn't have to be the best but it has to be good — with the most or almost the most touchdown passes and an impressive TD/interception ratio is the MVP. That is how it works; it is how it worked with Drake Maye and Matthew Stafford last year, it is how it works every year. By that metric, I think Jordan Love could backdoor this thing.

He will basically have to keep bombing touchdowns for the final eight games of the season and throw very few picks, but with how the Packers have looked recently, I could see him riding a narrative wave to the award. Meanwhile, Josh Allen's nine rushing touchdowns probably won't be enough to distract from his pretty lackluster passing season, and I'd say Joe Burrow is the real threat at this point. Statistically, he's doing what Love is doing but better, so we will need him to cool off. But as far as aggressively bold goes? This could be way worse.