Manchester United need a new manager but who would take it when they are in such a mess under the Glazers?

There’s plenty on Man Utd but we touch on Arsenal and referees too. Mail your thoughts to theeditor@football365.com

Can a manager survive an international break in the relegation zone?
In answer to your question, “Yes”, I do think Michael Carrick can and will survive in his job during and beyond. the International break.

Despite his tactical shortcomings and passive demeanour there’s nobody else available or stupid enough to take the job right now.

I’ll explain my point of view.

Over the years, since SAF retirement in 2013, I’ve listened intently to all of the debate and discussion by elite pundits and yet after all of the hot air has dissipated, the Glazers’ malign ownership remains as the largest elephant in the room at Manchester United.

Decline can take many years to painfully play out until rock bottom is eventually reached and now rock bottom for this previous modern day colossus is within touching distance and bar some miraculous turn around the EFL Championship beckons.

The lack of meaningful investment, pillaging, and effective governance over a twenty-one-year period has slowly brought this former football giant to its knees.

Everything that sits structurally beneath the owners is symptomatic and the outcome of the owners appalling greed, negligence and shameless arrogance.

Until the Glazers are completely gone from Man Utd and have sold their 71% controlling stake to serious new owners, not useless INEOS, the false dawns and perpetual suffering and misery of Manchester United supporters will continue all the way to the EFL Championship.
Nicholas Howard

Not Emery temperament is the same
I’m truly puzzled by Matt Stead’s article on Unai’s interview being the reason he ought not to be United manager. Presumably Jurgen Klopp wouldn’t have been suitable after storming out of an interview post United FA Cup defeat in 2024. Or Guardiola after “No, nothing, nothing. Everything is fine. Everything is fine.” following his strop after a Newcastle game in 2025.

Sure Unai’s reaction was one of irritation, but have you ever watched any of his other interviews? Always thanks the supporters. Never blames VAR or decisions against the team. And what does this have to do with managerial skills Manchester United would give their middle nut for.

I’ll leave you with this “implosion” – thank your lucky stars United fans for dodging a bullet.

Danny, Ottawa

Still sore about Emery
This is why you will not convince Arsenal fans that Emery is a better manager than Arteta. Maybe his equal but that’s all. Is this on the back of one bad game on Sunday ? No. The man has form, his teams when on the cusp of a good result, crumble.

As for flouncing out of the stadium and his performance when being interviewed, again he reverts to form. Fortunately as the “best manager” in the league this is not mentioned, even excused. To be honest I find it amusing but we all know the reaction if a certain other Spaniard did this once let alone on a regular basis.
Matt Coplestone

The balls are out for Man Utd
Based on the results of the last week, I thought I should drag my crystal balls out again, now thankfully repaired by our wonderful NHS (I’ll be out banging my pans tonight to show my appreciation).

Anyway, onto the future. This time I’ve managed to lock into Nov 2030, a year on from last time. It now transpires that Utd are now bottom of the National League. But wait, good news, they’ve not got new owners!

It’s none other than those cheepy chappies Jedward who’ve taken over. They bought all the Glazers and Ineos shares for £5 in total (massively overpriced) but seem happy with their new investment.

As for the Glazers, they discovered after the sale that the millions of debt they lumped onto the club was passed back to them and no one has seen them since. They are rumoured to be hiding out in one of their white trash trailer camps somewhere in darkest Florida. Whilst Lord Jim of Ineos (Nope, me neither), closed down another of his refineries and was last seen leaving the country muttering something about making it an unfit place for immigrants.

Jedward’s first act was to announce that after leading the club to 4 successive relegations that Michael and his team had been removed from the club, having had more than enough time to turn things around.

Similarly, all the players signed in the last 7 years, were discovered to be on 25-year contracts. Apparently, this was part of the best-in-class policy of following Chelsea’s idea of long contracts and reducing the annual write down, making more cash available for the Glazers to extract.

Fortunately, Jedward 2 despite being no lawyer managed to find a loophole and all those contracts have now been cancelled. With the focus now being on playing academy graduates.

Similarly, the best-in-class policy that led to staff being poached from the most successful and financially trustworthy organisation, did not seem to go beyond the reception and cleaning dept of City and these 2 have been masquerading as CEO and Director of Football for the last 5 years.

Jedward quickly got rid of these 2 and more and combined the role of CEO, Director of Football and Director of Recruitment into one role. This has been taken up by Fred the Red who will be responsible for morale, whilst the soon to be appointed manager will be allowed to get on with running the football side.

Meanwhile Old Trafford has been sold to Cerco who plan to turn it into a refugee centre. Apparently, they are going to flood the pitch so all the boats can be brought straight there from the coast so as to not cause too much stress to their occupants.

Carrington has also been sold for a housing estate and the men’s teams will transfer back to the Cliff with the only successful Utd team – the women, who because they were ignored by the previous owners are still in the WSL and doing well.

The men’s team have been warned that if it doesn’t work out, they will have to use the car park of the local Tesco instead.

Anyhow, my red battery lights are flashing on my balls, so I’ll need to go and recharge them now.
Russ

Premier League managers: What they SHOULD be
The current edition of Based On Their Looks, What They’d Be Doing If They Weren’t Football Managers:

Mikel Arteta: Amazon warehouse supervisor

Unai Emery: vampire (the oldies are the best)

Marco Rose: celebrity yachtsman

Keith Andrews: electrician

Fabian Hurzeler: modernist architect

Xabi Alonso: stripper

Frank Lampard: wedding organizer

Pierre Sage: French commando leader in WW2 film

David Moyes: sprite

Alvaro Arbeloa: Grand Inquisitor, Duke of Alba de Tormes, and advisor to the Borgias

Sergej Jakirovic: union boss

Gary O’Neil: junkyard owner

Daniel Farke: basso profundo (his real voice is a light tenor)

Andoni Iraola: waiter (apologies to Rafa Benitez)

Enzo Maresca: fisherman

Michael Carrick: second lieutenant in the British Army

Matthais Jaissle: professional gambler

Oliver Glasner: U-boat commander in WW2 film

Regis Le Bris: secondary school teacher

Roberto de Zerbi: avant-garde stage director
Peter G, Pennsylvania, USA

Smug Arsenal fans ahoy
My fellow Arsenal fans, enjoy these wonderful times. Soak up our time in the sun because we know how fast it can all disappear. We remember being in the doldrums while people ridiculed us for being “soft” and falling short while playing attractive football. Now these same muppets are drowning in tears because we’re not playing like the Invincibles in 2026! After trying to play like them for at least 14 years and not winning the major titles!

We used to dream of times like this and now we’re swimming in a lake of their tears. Let the tears wash over us and nourish us. They are sweet just like this Arsenal squad is sweet. A well-engineered team making the haters drop buckets of sweat, tears and saliva all over their keyboards as they mash keys desperately trying to find reasons to criticise our team. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Vish (AFC), Melbourne

…Can you give RHT/TS x a column please?

His Arsenal ramblings are much more amusing than Will Ford’s.

Arsenal and Arteta are living in his head and it’s hilarious.
Graham Simons, Gooner (We are top of the league), Norf London

An open letter to Mikel Arteta
Dear Mikel,

First, please let me apologise for referring to you in the past as El Monotone, Legohead, a little girl having a tantrum, a charisma bypass, a drab little beauraucrat, and deeply beige. Not because I didn’t mean every single word, but because I kinda need you onside for this letter to achieve its aim.

I beg – nay, beseech you, find a quiet corner of Colney, close your eyes, and think back to that glorious day when you were an excited little boy at the gates of La Masia, holding your mummy’s hand, little legs all a quiver, palms sweating, a tear in your eye. You were about to be trained in the way of Cruyff! Total football! Gloriously beautiful play to set the soul on fire, with a lethal cutting edge to make grown men weep with joy and the sheer disbelief that watching a simple game could feel this good!

I know they ultimately rejected you Mikel, and you took your first steps down the wrong road, choosing to become a nondescript defensive midfielder as a rejection of Barca’s values, and to allow you to cope with the pain perhaps, but sometimes in life you must rise above such setbacks.

You’ve gone further down the wrong track now, and that’s okay, because no one is perfect and everyone deserves a second chance – but now it’s time to turn around and join the warm glow of the beautiful game played in the right way Mikel, all the doors are still open for you! Look over there – isn’t that Luis beckoning you forward? And look! I think that’s Pep standing next to his friend smiling and waving to you too – remember what you learned under Pep’s tutelage? We’ll ignore you both perhaps being implicated in crimes against football almost as heinous as your own during that period because we saw the beauty you both produced on the pitch. And if you can, just for a moment, cast those weary eyes to the heavens above. I do believe you can just about make out Johan’s smiling avuncular eyes – if he hasn’t given up on you yet, then who am I to do so?

I know you can do this Mikel – Christ, YOU know you can do this. Tell your team of analysts to stop clipping up other managers leaving their technical areas – you don’t need dossiers on that negativity. Instead, why not get them to start looking at opponents and how to cut them to ribbons with all that attacking talent you have been furnished with. Think of how good putting newly promoted visitors Hull City to the sword might have been! Bring to mind, if you will, Jose slapping newly promoted Watford and WBA 4-0 back in the day. We’ve seen flashes of how good life could be for all of us – think of Bayern away last month – I know you are not a man given to overt displays of joy, but I urge you to connect with your emotions, even if you don’t want to show it on the surface. Filling your heart with the pure ecstasy of dishing out a stylish shellacking will nourish your soul. Look over there at Andoni’s toothy grin as he conducts his charges in the pursuit of attacking excellence. Look at Bradley flying forward in a wave of red attack! He could have been yours Mikel, he could have been yours. He might still be yet if you can just turn your back on the dark, howling void.

I’ve said enough for today now though, so I shall leave you with one last appeal. Remember the day when you were too nervous to follow the results? You were in your garden lighting the barbecue to keep your mind off the painful wait. Then the back door opened, and young Gabriel bounded down your perfectly manicured lawn towards you shouting, “Daddy, we are champions!”

Just think of this instead:

“Daddy, we are champions, and we did it playing beautiful football – I’m so proud to be your son!”

If nothing else, the thought of that wonderful moment coming to pass must surely be enough to persuade you to at least try to be more expansive more often?

The choice is yours: follow the dark side, give into your worst impulses and become an embittered old man like Jose ended up after he was cast out of Camp Nou and couldn’t control his darker instincts in the end, or go towards the light and stride triumphantly back through those same gilded La Masia gates some day, returning like a king among men.

Well, either that or let’s hope the Kroenkes hire Cesc instead.
RHT/TS x

(Watching Nico Paz play football makes me feel like I did when I used to climb the rope in PE at school)

Is it Stewie in disguise?
You do all realise that RHT/TS is just a Nom de Plume for our very own Stewie Griffin. It wasn’t immediately apparent when he slipped into our mailbox with bland generalisations about the game as a whole but now his Arsenal Bias is confirmed. Welcome back, Stewie; you have no one fooled at all.
Brett (really shouldn’t care but surely someone else must’ve noticed it…or is it just me? Just because I’m paranoid it doesn’t mean THEY aren’t out to get me)

One man and his obsession with Ref Watch
I wrote in over the weekend and said “I can’t wait for Dermott on Monday”.

I implore everyone to watch “Ref watch” as it is the funniest program currently on air.

We start with Utd’s late equaliser which he obviously thinks should be allowed to stand as Suzuki should be stronger. He accepts that Lammens never looks at the ball, he accepts that Lammens makes contact, but neither of these are sufficient to rule the goal out.

What he does also say is that the people in Stockley Park are not there to judge incidents and make recommendations (something I thought was their main function) but to judge if the referee has made an error, based on what he says he saw on the audio. i.e. I saw A, B and C, if they agree this is what happens, presumably even if the referee has failed to see something or they think his interpretation is wrong, they have to support the decision.

Somehow he then manages to come up with the following, Re the Bruno Fernandes high(?) foot, Dermott agrees with the decision again because “this is the total opposite of the Lammens one as he never takes his eyes off the ball”. WTAF? Two completely opposite events can result in the SAME outcome.

Amusingly Jay Bothroyd suggests the VAR should recommend a review and Tim Sutton says “I’ll tell you the refs response, What, you want me, in the 96th minute at Old Trafford, to go and have a look at that little monitor with everyone watching me, no thanks, goal stands”.

He also praises the referee and VAR for getting the Cunha penalty right and says it’s great to hear the audio (played at half time also) where we hear “he only gets the ball after getting the man”, I agree with this but we are not finished! Dermott says that Yoro avoids a red card as we hear the referee say “it’s contact on the foot”, I would argue it’s only contact on the foot as a result of making contact on the ankle first.

But then the “coup de grace”, the Havertz non penalty, Dermott explains the law as we all now understand it and says that “this is where the laws don’t help the referee, the player can’t do anything, he can’t play the ball, he can’t contest the defender, he can’t move towards the keeper, what’s he supposed to do”. He says common sense could/should prevail and the penalty be given. What’s that? Don’t give a penalty on the correct application of the law? TBF he does question the law and says “how can you give a penalty to a player who is never onside”

The Sky presenter says “so common sense would say no penalty, but the law says it is”, Dermott replies “No, I’m saying the laws says it is but common sense would say no”!!!!

Better yet, Dermott then praises the VAR trio as he’s heard the audio and the assistant says straight away “offside”, he says the process is fantastic as to them coming to the decision. Sorry to be pedantic Dermott, BUT THE WRONG DECISION WAS ARRIVED AT, good process springs to mind.

Dermott weekly displays the incompetence and inconsistency of his counterparts, what chance have we got.
Howard Jones

…As an addendum to my email, firstly who is Tim Sutton? (it didn’t feel right when I typed it!)

Anyway, Tim SHERWOOD does point out to Dermott that the “great communication and process leads to the wrong decision, and Mr. “I support the referee’s 99.999% of the time and these are the laws as they stand” Gallagher says, “I’m saying ethically, the right decision was reached”.
Howard Jones