YOU may have heard fans of other clubs mock the haunting anthem played before Arsenal’s homes matches called The Angel, but better known for its rousing chorus of ‘Oooooo North London forever’.

The capitalism-hugging critics must therefore hate this thoughtful song’s unsettling warning about the creeping tide of gentrification we have seen in this city, often at the expense of the working class. If you hate this song, then you hate council housing and cups of tea, and yet they call us the embarrassing ones.

Let me give you a far better contender for the season’s most obvious slice of cringe, and direct you to the normally inoffensive, Crystal Palace Football Club.

A surprise choice, many regular readers may think given well-explained rivalries with other teams, but there is something shuddering about watching them arrive in Brighton, marching through the town like it’s an old firm derby.

Imagine needing a police escort from the seafront because you are determined to show everybody how much you detest the even more inoffensive Brighton and Hove Albion.

The rest of the country has long puzzled over the origins of this mutual dislike, the emtwentythreeico match traced back to crossed words in the 1970s.

Sunday’s latest contest between the two was even more baffling because the Palace fans arrived with blow-up trophies and chanting about winning the Europa Conference League last season, a triumph which saw them overcome such majestic giants as Zrinjski Mostar, AEK Larnaca, Fiorentina (oooh!) and the mighty Rayo Vallecano in the final. It is quite something then to be singing “champions of Europe, we know what we are” while you are tumbling into a 3-0 deficit against your apparent greatest rivals of all time inside ten minutes.

And this is where we come to the need for new guidelines for confused fans of clubs who win the lesser Euro tournaments. West Ham, Spurs, Aston Villa, Palace… sorry you do not know who you are if you believe you have recently ruled the continent. The organisers just created easier cups for the lower ranks, a nice, kind gesture but, no, not champions of Europe.

Sadly, only Paris St Germain can claim that.