He may not have passed for any yards, but he was poised to pass for yards. In Week 8 of the 2026 NFL season, we witnessed a quarterback win a game in which they did not complete a pass for the first time since the Buffalo Bills pulled that off in 1974. And America's love affair with quarterbacks trudges ever onward, as we obsess over the success and failure of these individuals while they pull hilarious stuff like this and confuse everyone.

More on Baker Mayfield and his glorious accomplishment (or lack thereof) in a minute, as it is with tremendous delight that I present to you a list of four hilarious NFL quarterback stats from 2026 that will make you question the fabric of the universe and your very sense of self. Even irrefutable statistics can cause the occasional existential crisis.

Baker Mayfield wins a game without completing a pass

This really ... shouldn't be possible, and despite watching the entire game, I'm still not 100 percent sure how they pulled it off. They rushed for 324 yards and outgained the Falcons by almost 100, but it simply should not be possible to run the ball that effectively, even in a rainstorm, that you at no point need to draw up a pass play to get a chunk of yardage.

The real stat here is not Mayfield's 0-3 for 0 yards, but the fact that the Bucs as a team averaged 5.8 yards per carry on 56 rushes. That's out of control, and suggests supreme incompetence on the part of the Falcons front seven all day, getting tossed around like like sandbags by blockers on all levels. Their offense gave them no help of course, which leads us to our second stat.

Mayfield's passer rating more than tripled Michael Penix Jr.'s

Passer rating is a flawed stat. For example: if a player spiked the ball on every play or spiked the ball three times and just ran around and handed the ball off for the rest of the game (which is what Baker did), their passer rating would be 39.6. Penix, meanwhile managed to throw four interceptions on 8-24 passing, which netted him a crisp passer rating of 12.0. Penix legitimately played one of the worst games I'd ever seen from a passer, rain be damned, and I don't mind his rating being lower ... but is there maybe something wrong with our stat if a guy doesn't even need to pass the ball to record passer rating?

Justin Herbert hasn't thrown for 300 yards in over a year

To say I was captured by the hype of Mike McDaniel and Justin Herbert's partnership would be an understatement. I was all-in on this offense in all my fantasy football previews and literally did not see how someone with Herbert's record and physical skills could be anything less than elite with the offense that once took Tua Tagovailoa and turned him into an MVP candidate. Welp.

That offense had turned Justin Herbert into a pile of radioactive goo, and I have never seen a quarterback and offense look so broken and mismatched like Herbert and the Chargers do this year. They run all this interesting stuff; flea flickers, gimmick screens, clever motions and designs ... and then nobody is open, the play is blown up, Herbert gets lit up or throws the worst interception you've ever seen or a running back gets tackled for a loss of six. This could not be more of a debacle.

Gardner Minshew leads the NFL in EPA per play on the season

This is tongue-in-cheek since he only played a half, but he does! Look at the numbers, then also look at the next three names: Jaxson Dart, Drew Lock, Kenny Pickett??? What on earth? I'll have a video out on Friday about how EPA is calculated and why it's not as complex as we make it out to be, but this is one of those instances where we could use some total EPA or maybe a rational floor on snaps. If we use our brains to set a minimum, the actual leader is Trevor Lawrence, who passed Brock Purdy and Josh Allen.

MVP campaign coming?